Relationship Coaching Institute News- check out our great F`REE programs this month!
Relationship Coaching News
June 2006

In this issue:

Editor- David Steele
Founder and CEO
Relationship Coaching Institute

Copyright 2006 by Relationship Coaching Institute. All rights reserved. Feel free to share with others as long as our contact information and authorship is included. U.S. Library of Congress ISSN#1530-3055.

Conscious Dating:
Finding the Love of Your Life in Today's World

Available for order NOW at


Conscious Relationship
Tele-Seminar Series

Conscious Relationship Podcast

Conscious Relationship Article Bank

If you are receiving this from a friend and wish to subscribe, or are interested in our newsletters for Singles, Couples, or for Practice Building, visit /forms/subscribe.htm

To pass the word about us to a friend or colleague click here


1 Free Tele-Seminar: Getting Paid What You're Worth June 7
2 Free Tele-Seminar:  Creating Lasting Relationships June 8
3 New Series! Secrets and Strategies of Successful Relationships Audio recordings
4 Free Training:  Introduction to Relationship Coaching Tuesdays
June 6, 13, 20

Build Your Ideal Practice!

FREE TELE-SEMINAR: Wednesday June 7th-
9am Pacific/12pm Eastern/5pm UK

How to Get Paid What You're Worth

with Casey Truffo, founder of,

Ever notice how therapists tend to be paid less than most other helping professions? It doesn't have to be this way. There is something you can do about it today!

This seminar will cover how to:

  • Resolve those old issues with money and worth

  • Discuss money with prospects in a fluid, easy, and effective way

  • Set, collect and negotiate your fees without anxiety so that you get paid what you'd like to get paid!
Don't miss this teleseminar. (Your bank account will be happy that you attended!)

No need to register. This seminar is FREE for subscribers of our free monthly practice-building newsletter GETTING CLIENTS

To subscribe and receive your invitation to this seminar, please visit

Can't attend? No problem. The recording of this program will be available free for 30 days as our Seminar of the Month

Please share with your colleagues!


Free Conscious Relationship Tele-Seminar:
Thursday, June 8, 5:30pm pacific/8:30pm eastern

Creating Lasting Relationships

With Maya Kollman, MA

It's confusing when things seem to be going so well in a relationship, and then fall apart, even with the greatest of intentions. In this seminar we will discuss what gets in the way and how couples can create lasting change and the relationship that they long for.

This seminar will cover:

  • Understanding the unconscious agreement in relationships
  • how to unearth this agreement in your relationship
  • how to work together and co-create your relationship

No need to register! As a subscriber you will receive a reminder with the telephone bridge number needed to join a few days prior to the seminar.

Can't attend? No problem. The recordings of all our programs are available free at

Please share with your colleagues!


NEW! Free Audio Program For Our Subscribers  

Secrets and Strategies for Successful Relationships at Home and in Business

with best selling authors
(and RCI members)

Paul and Layne Cutright

Program #1:
Get Over It for Good! Conflict Resolution That Really Works

Program #2:
High Performance Communication Skills That Build More Trust and Understanding in Any Relationship

Program #3:
How to Find and Transform the Hidden Beliefs That Rule Your Relationships

FREE for our subscribers! To access these outstanding audio programs please visit

This series is Free! I hope you will check them out. Paul and Layne's work is outstanding and I'm excited to share them with you.


Introduction to Relationship Coaching

Starts June 6

Learn how to coach singles, couples, and develop a successful Relationship Coaching practice, taught by RCI founder David Steele and his teaching staff.

Introduction to Relationship Coaching includes 3 one-hour tele-classes, Tuesdays, June 6, 13, 20, 2006; 9:00am pacific/Noon eastern.

Class #1 How to Coach Singles June 6
Class #2 How to Coach Couples June 13
Class #3 How to Build a Successful Relationship Coaching Practice June 20

Each class includes practical information and materials you can use immediately in your practice.

Can't make our training dates/times? Each class is recorded for those unable to attend, and we also offer an ON-LINE VERSION.

Please share with your colleagues! To register or for more information, visit /forms/freeteleclass.htm


Welcome New RCI Coaches

The following professionals recently joined our ranks:

Barbara Blitzer, LCSW

Silver Spring, MD

Stephanie Harwood Stirling, Scotland
Heather MacMillan Charlottestown, PEI, Canada

Feature Article:
Frustrated with Internet Dating? Top Five Ways to Find Your Mate Without a Computer

By David Steele

In a new trend, singles are becoming increasingly disillusioned with internet dating and seeking alternatives. In spite of millions of singles using the internet and the promises and success stories of online matchmaking websites, I've heard the same thing over and over from singles across the country who are frustrated with internet dating-

"It's great to have a lot of choices, but it takes a lot of time and I don't seem to meet anyone I have much chemistry with."

This trend makes sense to me. In some ways, using a computer to find your soul mate is like trying to cook a souffle in a microwave. Some things just require time, effort, and the human touch.

This article explores the upsides and downsides of internet dating, attempts to explain why internet dating doesn't work for some (most?) singles, and suggests some alternatives.

Top Five Advantages of Internet Dating

1. Reach more singles
2. Inexpensive (relatively)
3. Enough information available for efficient sorting
4. Anonymous
5. Easy to control most aspects of the process

Top Five Downsides of Internet Dating

1. Overwhelming number of choices
2. Encourages "shopping" mentality
3. Many users are less than truthful
4. Some users are game players, predators. cheaters
5. Complacency- tempting to rely on the internet and exclude other options

The Internet, Chemistry, and the Law of Attraction

Today's singles seem to be relying on their computer a bit too much and complacently expecting the internet to deliver their soul mate. This is a version of the Fairytale Trap (one of fourteen dating traps in my book "Conscious Dating"). The internet is a wonderful tool (I use it!) but doesn't seem to work effectively as the only tool for finding potential partners.

I believe that the two biggest reasons why the internet isn't effective for many singles is the role of chemistry and the Law of Attraction.

Chemistry is critically important for a successful relationship. Everyone wants a partner they feel strong chemistry with, and a relationship would be pretty dry and unsustainable without it. The Fourth Principle of Conscious Dating is "Balance Your Heart With Your Head." Identifying your requirements, needs, and wants does not minimize the need for chemistry. You need both! I like to think of chemistry as the radar that helps you find your target, then you use your requirements, needs and wants to decide "yes" or "no."

The Law of Attraction is inescapeable and either works for you or against you. If you're "busy" or "shy" and the internet is your only means of reaching potential partners, in a way you're hiding behind your computer and the Law of Attraction is not likely to help you. The Law of Attraction states that "like attracts like" and "energy follows attention," meaning your results reflect your thoughts and your actions. Over the years I've become convinced that the Law of Attraction is a powerful law of the Universe, like gravity. Just like "what goes up must come down," try as you might, you can't avoid or change the principle that "like attracts like."

If you're hiding behind your computer, what people, relationships, and results are you likely to attract?

Top Five Ways to Find Your Mate Without a Computer

1. Use your support community

Most people find their soul mate through someone they know, so don't be a lone ranger (another dating trap!) and lean on your friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors to assist you to meet potential partners.

2. Start a dating pool or networking group

Get a group of singles together (any gender mix) to support each other to meet potential partners. Most singles know lots of other singles of both genders, so pool your resources and do some matchmaking for each other!

3. Reach out to people

In today's busy world with cell phones, texting, instant messaging, e-mail, and the internet promoting impersonal ways of interacting with others, it's easy to forget the lost art of engaging with real people that are right in front of you. Make an effort to reach out to the people you come into contact with in your everyday life and watch your relationships blossom.

4. Make more friends

Since most people find their soul mate through someone they know, be open to developing new friendships and expanding your support community. Chances are you already have acquaintances at work and other places that you would enjoy spending more time with. Friends are easier to find than dates, and friendships often last longer than romantic relationships!

5. Get involved

Too many singles lead isolated lives centered around work, home, and a few friends. Participating in clubs, groups, classes, charities, church/temple, is the most important way you can leverage the Law of Attraction to help you find your soul mate. You'll meet new people, make new friends, and pursue hobbies and interests important to you that bring you in contact with other compatible singles.

Balancing High Tech with High Touch

Technology can help us in many ways. However, let's not forget that humans are social beings and finding your life partner is a relationship goal that is probably more effectively acheived by getting away from your computer. You're more likely to find relationship fulfillment by living a full, rich life among real people doing the things you enjoy that make your life meaningful.

As the ancient Roman playwright Terence once said- "Moderation in all things." Do you think he meant the internet as well?

Let's address this problem of over-reliance on the internet for finding love. Please pass this article along to the frustrated singles in your life that you care about!

© 2006 David Steele– All rights reserved.

David Steele, MA, LMFT is founder of Relationship Coaching Institute and author of the new ground-breaking book for singles Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of Your Life in Today's World



Invitation #1
I invite you to share your announcements, wins, coaching or practice tips with the rest of us. Be visible! Let's connect!  Send them to me at

Invitation #2
I invite you to share this newsletter with a colleague.  There is a tremendous need for our services, and we need to work together. Relationship Coaching is in its infancy, and we must collaborate to build our market niche and position as a resource of wide appeal for anyone who wants a successful relationship.

To pass the word about us to a friend or colleague, please visit

Invitation #3
I invite you to listen to the following introductory recordings 24 hours a day at your convenience by visiting /audio/index.htm (some are available by telephone)

  • Commitment: The Secret Ingredient to Relationship Happiness
  • The Communication Map™
  • Introduction to Relationship coaching
  • All about RCI
  • Practice Building Intensive (sample conference call)
  • And more!

Invitation #4
I invite you to get the support you need to be successful in your practice. We are available for information, training, ideas, mentor coaching, etc.

Invitation #5
If you are a coach or therapist who received this from a colleague, I invite you to visit our web site and contact us at
for information on joining us and becoming a RCI Relationship Coach. Join our free "Introduction to Relationship Coaching teleclass series.

Invitation #6
To subscribe to this newsletter, our newsletter for SINGLES, our newsletter for COUPLES, or our PRACTICE BUILDING newsletter, visit

Invitation #7
For a description of RCI relationship coaching trainings, schedule, and enrollment info, select "Joining RCI" from the left menu at

How do you like our newsletter? Your feedback is welcome!  Until next time....

Best regards,
David Steele, MA, LMFT
Relationship Coach
CEO and Founder of Relationship Coaching Institute
Telephone:  888.268.4074


For More Information

For Past Issues of this Newsletter

Our Purpose
The purpose of this newsletter is to connect, support each other, inform, and build a strong community of coaches dedicated to helping people find fulfillment in their lives and relationships.

This monthly newsletter is written for the benefit of RCI Relationship Coaches, and is available to interested others. Feel free to share this with a colleague. Your submissions and feedback are welcome!

Our Mission
To provide the tools, information and support to help singles find the love of their life and the life that they love, and to help couples co-create fulfilling and lasting Life Partnerships.

Copyright Notice
This newsletter is copyrighted and all rights are reserved. Feel free to share with others as long as our contact information and authorship is included.
U.S. Library of Congress ISSN#:1530-3055

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