Success Story of the Year Contest
the two year anniversary of the publication of Conscious
Dating: Finding the Love of your Life in Today's World
on February 13, 2008 we'll announce the results of our second annual-
Success Story of the Year Contest
awarding an iPod Nano loaded with our best Conscious Relationship Audio
Programs ($400.00 value) to the first and second place winners.
out last year's winners here
will be judged by the staff of Relationship Coaching Institute. To be
eligible entrants must certify that they have read the Conscious Dating
book. All submissions become property of Relationship Coaching
Institute and by entering this contest entrants grant us permission to
publish their story online and in print.
Do you have a success story to share?
Go immediately to www.consciousdating.com/contest.htm
Know anyone with a success story to share? Please
forward this announcement to them!
Know a single who hasn't read Conscious Dating and is a success story
in the making? Please send
them to www.consciousdating.com
the contest begin!
Edition of Conscious Dating Book!
The second edition of
Conscious Dating has just been released. Here are some changes in the
- New sub-title-
"Finding the Love of Your Life and the Life That You Love"
- "Conscious Dating"
more clearly defined and explained in the Introduction
- Paperback (second
edition is not available in hardback)
- "Dating Red Flags
Checklist" added to Chapter 8
- Jeanette Ball's
inspiring Conscious Dating Success Story of the Year added to the
The impetus for the
second edition was our distributor requiring a paperback version for
placement in bookstores. As long as we were going to publish a
paperback version, it seemed like a good idea to update the book with
the new material developed since publication.
The first edition
hardback and CD is still available on our website at www.consciousdating.com
The second edition is now
available at BarnesandNoble.com
as well as bookstores around the country.
These programs provide
advanced information, strategies, and tips to help you find the love of
Each program includes the
MP3 audio recording, complete written transcript, and Study Guide to
follow along and take notes.
Program #1- Are You
Ready for Love?
Program #2- Being The
Program #3- Ten Steps
for Finding Your Soul Mate
Program #4- Conscious
Dating: How to Connect to Your Life Vision
Program #5- Conscious
Dating for Boomers: Finding Love After 50
Program #6- Scouting:
Where to Find Your Soul Mate
Program #7- Advanced
Strategies for Sorting, Screening, and Testing
Program #8- Conscious
Internet Dating: Using Your Computer to Find Your Soul Mate
Dating at a Distance: What to Do When You're Attracted to Someone 1200
them out at www.ConsciousDatingAudio.com
you're dating someone do you ever wonder-
"Is this the right
relationship for me?"
Our Conscious Mating
Audio Programs provide detailed, comprehensive strategies for dating
and mating, addressing all the relationship and decision-making
challenges that arise when you're single and seeking your soul mate.
These audio programs are
recorded from our live tele-seminars and include the MP3 audio file for
playing on your computer, MP3 player (iPod or other), or burning onto a
CD, AND a complete PDF transcript for following along and making notes.
Program #1- Is This the
Right Relationship for Me? Introduction to the Pre-commitment Stage
Program #2- Am I Ready
to Be a Couple?
Program #3- Finding
Lasting Love by Experiencing Your Experience
Program #4- Should We
Program #5- Dealing
With Our Baggage
Program #6- Are We
Program #7- Sharing Our
Program #8- Deciding
"Is This The One?"
Program #9- When We
Must Say Goodbye
them out at www.ConsciousMatingAudio.com
Ask Our Coaches:
Single on Valentine's Day? What to Do
... Do you have any suggestions for me and others
like me to get
through this holiday which is all about love and romance?
This column answers
questions submitted by our readers. Submit your questions to
who will forward them to our coaches all over the world. Each issue,
we'll publish a few answers from our RCI coaches.
Valentine's Day is only a couple of weeks away. I'm 43, divorced for 4
years and a mother of a teenage daughter. I broke up with a man I was
dating for about two years, right before Thanksgiving, and I am not
currently dating anyone. I feel very alone. I love this holiday and
have many good memories of spending it with my former love. Do you have
any suggestions for me and others like me to get through this holiday
all about love and romance - especially when we don't have that in our
I can relate to how you
feel as I have spent many a Valentine's Day by myself. The most
profound and meaningful relationship that we ever have is the
relationship with ourselves. All other relationships take their cue and
flow out of that relationship. Being able to receive gestures that come
from yourself will more fully enable you to receive them from a loving
partner when that presents itself.
I suggest that you put some thought into how you would treat a partner
and how you would wish the partner to treat you on Valentine's Day.
Then, select a few of those items and treat yourself. I have cooked
candlelight dinners for myself on certain romantic occasions as well as
given myself flowers. It may seem a bit odd at first, but you will be
amazed at how great it feels to do these special things for you. You
are sending yourself a message that you are worthy and deserving. Once
you get used to it, it can be even more special than coming from a
Maddox | 214.528.5426
I'm 66, married twice
and divorced twice. Valentine's Day was a lonely holiday for me for
many years between significant others or husbands. What works for me is
to be in the NOW and gift myself on that special day. I might go to a
spa, have a massage, gather a girlfriend or two and plan a delicious
dinner or buy myself a gift.
One Valentine's Day about 12 years ago, I bought myself a stuffed
animal, a skunk with a 'sweet' personality, that moved it's tail from
side to side, held a pillow that read, 'I love you' and sang the song,
'How sweet it is to be loved by you'. I stood facing a mirror at home,
holding the skunk in front of me singing and dancing to, "How Sweet It
Is To Be Loved By Me."
When all is said and done, who is our most significant life partner?
Our very own precious self. Once we develop a love relationship with
ourself, we will never be lonely again, even when we're alone! Be
creative and give yourself the best and most lasting gift of all, love!
Consider yourself “hugged”!
Epstein | www.LifeStrategyCoach.org
If you're unhappy
about being single, do something about it. Instead of focusing on what
you don't have, think about what you want. Being single is a great
opportunity! Until you find that special person, and you will, consider
1. Start Anew. Valentine's Day can be your New Year's resolution day
for all elements of a year of new love!
2. If you dream of a happy romantic relationship, realize it takes
commitment, effort and planning.
3. Identify any
"baggage" that holds you back from the relationship you truly want.
What areas in your life do you need to work on to be ready to meet love
on love's terms?
4. Assess your relationship readiness skills. What are your
deal-breakers? Your values and life vision?
5. Live your life as a successful single - don't put your life on hold
while you wait for your partner to show up. Be positive. Have fun!
6. Celebrate! Valentine's Day is a great excuse to celebrate life and
love. Shower yourself with love and/or spend time with a friend or
relative who loves you unconditionally. Book a day at the spa and
7. Take some risks and experience things you dare not usually do. Smile
and engage in conversation wherever you are. You may be surprised at
the response and at how good you feel.
Frankie Doiron | www.FrankieDoiron.com
Having been in this position myself, I can really empathize with you.
However there are many ways in which you can still enjoy
Valentine’s without having a man in your life.
One of the most important ways to celebrate is to be your own
Valentine! Don’t spend time reminiscing about past holidays.
Create wonderful new and different memories.
If you have single friends, make reservations at a nice restaurant, or
if it’s more comfortable, invite your friends to a special
dinner at home. Dress up. Use pretty place mats, add candles and
flowers. Sharing a nice meal and wine with friends and/or family is a
wonderful way to celebrate Valentine’s Day.
Have a pajama party. Enjoy snacks, chocolate, games and just have a
good time. Kids are not the only ones who do this! Women love this,
too. If you’re at home invite your daughter to be part of
some of it if you’re comfortable with that.
The most important thing is to do something that you love to do just
because it’s for you. Loving yourself on this and every other
day will help you to move further toward having what you want in life.
MFT,MCCht, CNLP | www.TheAstonishingPowerofYou.com
Valentines Day is all
about LOVE. Unfortunately, it also puts a lot of pressure on romantic
relationships. As a result of this pressure, this is also a day that
many couples break up and still many others get into arguments. That is
because our expectations are so high! Releasing unrealistic
expectations and creating a new definition of what Valentine's Day
should look like will go a long way.
You have a teenage daughter and I bet some great girlfriends. I know
sometimes teenagers aren't interested in spending time with mom;
however, you can probably bribe her with a shopping trip and dinner
out! If she has something to do on Valentines Day, make February 15th
Valentines day -- dinners are less expensive and restaurants are less
Additionally, many towns
show the play, Vagina Monologues, right around Valentines Day. Gather a
group of girlfriends for a great night out. And Patricia, like any
holiday, make it about giving, not receiving and surprise one great
friend with a bouquet of flowers -- that should be fun!
Lori Rubenstein, JD,
CPC | www.transcendingdivorce.com
Growing by Facing Your Fears
by Lisa Fredette
Coach Lisa Fredette talks about fear and how to reframe it so that it
becomes a stepping-stone to creating and living the life you love.
One of the first emotions
that I experienced when my husband and I separated was fear. I would
have thought it would be anger, but that came later. Fear is what
showed up first for me -- fear of being alone, fear of the unknown and
fear of being a failure.
I was married for sixteen
years. My whole life revolved around my husband and my daughter. When
my marriage fell apart, I did not have much of a support system in
place. After the tears subsided and reality set in, I was what I feared
most in my life -- a divorced single mom. A gut wrenching feeling of
fear set in.
What is fear? Rhonda
Britten, author of Fearless
Living, defines fear as
"...both the cause and effect of the feelings, thoughts, or actions
that prohibit you from accepting yourself and realizing your full
potential. It is the gate keeper of your comfort zone." If you look at
fear as an acronym, False Evidence Appearing Real, it is much easier to
face. If whatever it is that you are afraid of is really false, then
you can set it aside or move through it. Now doesn't that make life
One of Your Biggest Fears: Failure
The best way I have found
to combat fear is to just face it head on and move through it. Many
people are fearful of failure. I say define failure. Because you do not
achieve what you set out to do, does it mean you failed or does it mean
that you were just not meant to achieve that particular goal? When you
are in a situation where you feel you failed, ask yourself what was it
was that you gained or learned. You can always learn from it, so in
essence it can not be a failure then, can it?
If nothing else,
congratulate yourself for taking the risk. Many people are so paralyzed
by fear that they are unwilling to take the risk. The fact that you
took the risk is worthy of praise and admiration.
If you are afraid to try
something because you might fail, think about the worse case scenario
and then ask yourself, "If I do this, will I survive?" Unless the worse
case scenario is death, you can survive --so just do it. As they say,
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." A great story depicting
this very thing can be found in Dale Carnegie's book How
to Stop Worrying and Start Living.
You will be amazed how great you feel for taking the risk.
Challenge for You!
My challenge for you is
to look fear in the face, today, and take a risk. You will be glad you
did. You will be amazed how great you feel for taking this step. What a
self-esteem builder. And if nothing else, it will give you a great
story to tell your children, grandchildren or friends. Take me up on my
challenge. Walk outside your comfort zone and discover the wonderful
world that awaits you.
Copyright © by
Lisa Fredette. All rights reserved in all media.
A. Fredette | www.LisaFredette.com
Are You Ready for a Successful Relationship?
by Dr. Jackie Black
Jackie Black explores 5 key life areas we should examine prior to
beginning our next relationship. By improving these areas,
we’ll be better prepared to enjoy our life with someone else.
Your life will not be
"better" if you are in a relationship. We take ourselves with us
wherever we go... especially into love relationships.
A successful, committed
relationship depends upon being ready:
- Legally, and
for the life and
relationship that you want. Get your personal work done first!
you ready Physically?
- Are you actively
engaged in a physical fitness program?
- Are you committed to
eating health-promoting foods?
- Do you do your best,
most of the time, to avoid overeating, or eating too much sugar and fat?
- Do you take care of
your gums and teeth and make sure your breath is sweet?
- Is your personal
hygiene the very best it can be? If not, are you making the necessary
you ready Emotionally?
- Are you over your past
relationships? That is, have you resolved any hurt and or anger that is
a normal part of breaking up.
- Are you actively
engaged in a personal growth process facilitated by a professional to
heal childhood pain that may interfere with an intimate adult
- If you have trouble
with anger, holding grudges, shutting down emotionally or
“leaving the scene,” are you taking the time to
learn and practice more resourceful behaviors?
you ready Financially?
- Are you actively, and
with intention, resolving any credit card debit you may have
- If you are paying
child support and/or spousal support have you integrated these expenses
into your budget?
- Have you clarified
your financial goals for the next 12 months? Five years? Ten years?
Over 10 years? For retirement?
you ready Legally?
- Are you actively, and
with intention, resolving any legal situations that may exist?
- If you are divorced,
is your custody, spousal support and child support resolved? Are you
being honest and honorable in all your personal and business dealings
to insure, to the best of your ability, that you will not become
involved in any unpleasant legal matters again?
you ready Spiritually?
- Are you a religious
person? A spiritual person? Agnostic or atheist?
- Is becoming involved
with a person of the same faith important to you? To your family?
- Is raising your
children (existing or future) in a particular faith important to you?
To your family?
- Have you actively,
and with intention, thought about theses issues? Have you come to any
conclusions? Do you have any preferences?
- Clarify your personal
vision, requirements, needs and wants.
- Spend all the time it
takes to answer the questions: Who am I? What do I want? How do I get
what I want?
- Focus on developing
and practicing dating and inter-personal relationship skills.
Be as ready as you can
be to meet your ideal mate and create the life and the love life that
affirms and esteems your best self! Only YOU can make it happen!
Copyright © Dr.
Jackie Black 1999-2008. All rights reserved in all media.
Jackie Black | www.DrJackieBlack.com
F`ree monthy Conscious
Conscious Dating Audio Programs
our website at www.ConsciousDating.org
for FREE cutting-edge information and tools for finding the love of
your life, including:
" Register for our 5-Day e-Program for Singles, "How To Find Your Life
" Take our proprietary Relationship Readiness Quiz
" Listen to outstanding audio programs such as "Find the Love of Your
Life AND The Life That You Love" and "Conscious Dating for Relationship
" Access our Knowledge Bank for innovative relationship tools,
strategies and concepts
" Check out our talented RCI-trained Relationship Coaches at www.ConsciousDating.org/coach
a resource for singles offered by Relationship Coaching Institute, is a
worldwide relationship coaching organization dedicated to helping you
'find the love of your life AND the life that you love'. For more
information about us, please visit our web site at www.consciousdating.org
Tired of being alone? Get a Relationship Coach! Check out our coaches
NEW RELATIONSHIP? Congratulations in moving forward in your life
partner quest! WHAT NOW?
for cutting-edge information and resources for couples. You will be
glad you did! Please share this with new couples that you care about.
Are you a coach or other helping professional who works with singles
and couples? If you want to know more about adding the Conscious Dating
Relationship Coaching tools to your professional toolbox, visit relationshipcoachinginstitute.com
Please share this newsletter with your single friends, family, and
co-workers, and you can be a partner in their success, too!
Links to Us
Kachaturoff | Editor, Conscious
Dating Newsletter for Singles firstname.lastname@example.org
Visit our website for
singles at www.ConsciousDating.org
Free introductory training! relationshipcoachinginstitute.com
Members of Relationship
Free resources for singles and couples www.RelationshipCoachingNetwork.org
subscribe to this newsletter and join our f`ree Conscious Dating Online
refer singles your care about to www.ConsciousDating.org
Free monthly tele-seminars! www.BuildingYourIdealPractice.com
Copyright 2008 by
ConsciousDating.org. All rights reserved. Feel free to share this with
others as long as our contact information and authorship is included.